Learning to Let Go

I’ve written several blog posts. And in about fifty percent of them I talk about how type “A” I am and what a control freak I can be.

When Wicked Good started Dani and I learned on the fly how to run a business. It was the two of us, seven days a week, fourteen hours a day. I developed a strangle hold on the business and had myself convinced that only I could decorate, manage, and create. Dani handled the baking and shipping. We had some employees who were very part time. For the most part it was just us.

As most business owners can tell you this is a recipe for disaster if you actually want your business to survive. No one perons is an island. And certainly we weren’t equipped to build a national brand on our own.

Enter my husband Scott. We hired Scott to come on board with us to help take our business to the next level. I have to say, it wasn’t easy. Scott is my third husband and quite honestly I divorced the first two because they tried to tell me what I could and couldn’t do. So now imagine him stepping into our “world” and making changes and actually saying “no.”

In the beginning, it was just Dani and I. But when re realized we needed help, we turned to my husband Scott - enter stage left...

In the beginning, it was just Dani and me. But when we realized we needed help, we turned to my husband Scott – enter stage left…

Creatively, I’m a genius. I have that gift. But as far as numbers are concerned I’m a disaster and I know that. It was hard for me to hand the reins over, even partially. But I also knew it was for the good of everyone at Wicked Good, myself included.  I constantly had to ask myself, “Is this idea I have something I want for the sake of my ego or is it something the business needs.” By answering this question honestly and thoughtfully I’m pretty much guaranteed that I will make the right decision each and every time. And if not, I have Scott to point out the pros and cons to me.

I’ve also had to learn this lesson in my personal life as well. Scott and I have moved my parents in with us as well as his parents. We are now responsible for 4 adults other than ourselves. My dad is in the beginnings of the severe stages of Alzheimer’s Disease. My mom suffers from Dementia. Scott’s dad has terminal bone cancer and his mom deals with degenerative spine disease along with a host of other medical conditions.

My father who suffers with Alzheimer’s and my mother who has Dementia moved in with us in January of 2015

My father who suffers with Alzheimer’s and my mother who has Dementia moved in with us in January of 2015

Once again, I tried to do it all myself. That quickly ended once I suffered my 100th panic attack and faced the reality that running a business, caring for four very needy people and trying to have some semblance of a personal life was not going to ever happen if I continued on the way I was. This was tough because my home is where I lay down the law, make the decisions, decorate, cook, clean, organize, schedule, manage and maintain. In essence, like Wicked Good, it is my domain.

More recently, Scotts father who has terminal bone cancer, and his mother moved in with us as well

More recently, Scotts father who has terminal bone cancer, and his mother moved in with us as well

Thankfully the lessons I learned about sharing the load at work were much more easily transitioned at home. I told myself that “I just can’t do it all.” Once I uttered these words aloud I felt free to seek out the help needed to run a safe, comfortable and happy home for all involved.

Trying to do everything one’s self can be a very selfish play especially when others are to be considered. It is not a sign of weakness to admit you’re in over your head. Quite the opposite. It shows awareness and that you care about what’s going on around you and that you want others to succeed, be safe and grow along with you.

If you need help, ask for it. If your business is growing, by all means hire those who know more than you! If your home life is crazy and making you feel out of control…get help.

Remember, it’s the wise person who knows their limitations and seeks out experienced people to come on board. Your company will grow and flourish once you let go of the strangle hold you have on your business. That I promise.

And your home will become a place you look forward to going to again, once you have the faith that everyone is safe and where they should be.

Happy spring everyone and continued success in your business and peace in your homes.

~T